So anyway, you might have heard about a certain political cartoon in the New York Post that's causing quite the uproar as of late. If not, this, this, and this should catch you up. God almighty, where does a guy even start without pushing at least one frakkin' hot button?! This is such a touchy subject I'm almost afraid to post my thoughts on it. As it is, I'm going to keep this as short and simple as I can as to avoid any and all potential hate mail, protests, and/or rallies that may or may not result from me, Joe M. Whiteman, voicing my opinion on the subject.
To the leaders of the African American community...please give it a rest! Have the expressions "A room full of monkeys could have done a better job" or "Put a group of monkeys in front of a typewriter and eventually they'll type out Shakespeare" never passed your ears...ever? Never?! REALLY?!?!
...wow...
...who knew?
The only thing the cartoonist was guilty of was not having enough sense to show an entire room full of bullet-riddled sapiens rather than the single victim. No one, everybody get that, NO ONE was making any similarities between chimpanzees and our new President (or anyone else in the black community at large). All in all, it was actually a very clever political pun (feel free to call me a lousy, no good, inbred, backwoods, redneck, white-supremacist cracker anytime - I can take it). No one has been oppressed by the cartoon. No one in the cartoon suggested any form of hate against a black individual. It's a pun, plain and simple, so please everyone just step back for a minute...breathe...good. Now, put away your righteous indignation for a moment and realize that it's 2009, a black man is in the Oval Office, workplace of the most powerful man on the planet. Rap stars and basketball players are making more money every year than Solomon ever dreamed of. And there's nary an African American even alive today that even had a grandparent that was a slave. I don't know if I'm feeling so bold as to say, "You've WON!". Oh, I guess I just did...hrmm. Having said all that I fully expect Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson to show up on my front lawn in a few days demanding I apologize to the entire black community.
Chris Rock was right once when he said that, "...there ain't a single white person in America that would change places with me...and I'm RICH!!!". Black people still are treated differently in nearly every business and social situation in this country. More often than not though, I think one would find that that is a result of fear on the part of the white party - fear how the black party (or minority in general) will react to what is being said and/or done. Here comes the part I'm certain many people, both black and white (but particularly black) don't want to hear: If you want to be equal, if you want to end segregation...stop segregating yourselves! That's it! It's that simple...blacks in this country don't want to actually be part of white society as much as they perceive that whites don't want them. Everybody just needs to get along...gay as that sounds. Each generation seems to become more tolerant than the last...which is a great thing! Extremists will never go away - but as the population blossoms, their herds will thin. Look, I understand completely from the historical standpoint where Reverend Al and the NAACP are coming from. It just seems to me they're trying too hard to find hate and malice where there really isn't any. I guess I just find it...distasteful...that I'm not really allowed to voice my opinion openly because of the color of my skin. Holy fuck!!! When did that happen?!
I don't know...I'm just hoping I'll live to see a day when everyone will get the joke and not see it as an excuse to spew hate and nonsense at each other. But I'm fat...so probably not...
5 comments:
The fact that anything in this cartoon was seen as racially controversial belies a certain paranoia. My response to reading your news links was, "Give me a fucking break."
You said it best. Al Sharpton has ALWAYS been overly sensitive (paranoid) about this shit. It's like that Schoenberg quote Herr Vogler always uses to apply to me, that Al Sharpton is quick to defend even when no attack was made (paraphrased).
This wasn't a racial cartoon. It wasn't. Sorry that chimps have been used to denigrate African Americans in the past, but what the fuck, if you demand the firing of this cartoonist then you might as well demand the closing of every single fried chicken joint in the fucking country. If that's the level of paranoid outrage we're talking here, let's fucking shake hands and boycott barbecued ribs, because it's been used to make racial jokes in the past. Fuck. Of course that's hyperbole for humor's sake, but it also gets my point across.
I mean, how many times have I said, when I worked as a cashier this past Christmas season, "A retarded monkey could do my job." Yeah, a retarded monkey, which makes it decidedly more controversial than this cartoon. Because "retard" is the latest taboo slur, you know.
Speaking of which, you might not have caught this when you wrote your post, but your derisive use of "gay" is, nowadays, more controversial than any of the (I think most decidedly benign) opinions you've expressed here. Ironically, daring the mouthpieces of Imaginary Discord to come knock on your door will actually piss off a different set of indignant oppressed. You'll open your door, see a handful of white gay-lesbian-alliance spokespeople, and say, "What the fuck are you guys doing here?"
You can't win. People are going to be pissed off. I learned a long time ago that I'm not allowed to say anything in this free-thinking, free-speech society of ours. Yes, it's a double standard, but I'm not allowed to have an opinion because I'm a Protestant white male.
I'm actually not irate about this at all. This was just a tired rant. I'm tired of hearing people call for the firing of someone because they inferred something that the person never even fucking said, much less intended. Jesus. Age of tolerence, eh?
Incidentally, I'm very evasive about such bullshit inquiries such as when people are probing you for your stance on controversial, divisive issues, clearly only interested if you are "with or against" them. I'm not opressing anybody--never have, never will. The only thing that pisses me off about gay marrige is when people treat it like THE issue of concern and put more immediate concerns down on the list, like health care and economic shit that affects everyone in a very fucking terrifying way. Mainly, my issue with gay marriage is that I wish people would just make a decision and move the fuck on so I don't have to hear about all this bickering all the time. I call people on their bullshit, and for that reason sometimes I sound like a champion for gay marriage, but in reality I would never vote for gay marriage. GASP! WHAT DID HE SAY?
That's right, I won't. But I also wouldn't vote against it, so fuck off. If you aren't 10,000% in favor of gay marriage then you are a bigoted troglodyte. Yeah, oh, never mind the boundless labyrinth of logic, semantics, economics, philosophy, and psychology behind all this shit. No, you're right, I must be a Bible-beating bigot because I've never heard a decent, conclusive argument on either side. Well, fuck all you guys. Controversy is unavoidable. But I'm pretty fucking harmless, aren't I.
All this shit. Because I'm not gay, I have to bend over backwards to be pro-gay or else I'm an unenlightened asshole. I have gay friends. But everyone says that in their defense. "Oh, it's okay, I can say that because my cousin's roommate is dating an Indian guy" or some shit like that. I used to kiddingly and ironically (and actually affectionately) make anti-French jokes, but I had a French fucking roommate AND I rolled with a crowd of French exchange students thereafter. I had nothing against the French, but a mutual voice major friend of Herr Vogler's and mine got offended, like I was a bigot for teasing the French. And this girl wasn't even fucking French, so why was she offended? Because she is, as you said, looking for things to be offended by. But then I realized how hypocritical it sounded to use the aforementioned defense, "It's all right, I have a bunch of French drinking buddies." I should have said, "No, I was being ironic, because that's the opposite of how I actually feel."
Jesus fuck, look at how much damage control I have to do just to explain myself on this of all blogs. Because I know people will jump down my throat otherwise. That's the PC age we live in.
For what it's worth, my sensei is black. The man I look up to the most in the world. So fuck off, everybody.
The only way to convince people that I'm a decent guy is to marry an African American Lesbian Jew. Somehow I don't see that happening.
Word verification: eradi
......cate them all.
Well, at least it's nice to see this has generated a fair amount of relevant, topical discussion instead of the usual onslaught of "booger, booger, fart, fart, weiner, weiner, booby, booby, pubes".
As for the gay community, I was fairly well aware of what I was saying - honestly, I'm not worried about 90% or so of them. What are they gonna do - style my hair?! I've known and befriended my fair share of homosexuals in my time, and really, most of them are about as threatening as a piss-bubble floating on the water of my toilet. I'm actually completely for gay marriage - I see the concept as a union between two people who love each other, not some Judeo-christian dogmatic nonsense about the bonds between man and woman. Having said that, I really wish the issue would go away too! I'm not going to jump into the fight on that one anytime soon...or ever! There are, as you said, waaaaaay too many important issues in our little world today to worry about whether or not Lanthhh and Lewithhh can tie the knot. "Oh Jethuthh Chrithhht!"
I often wonder if people like Al Sharpton realize how much of a detrement to their own cause (or is it crusade) they actually are.
As for the French - they can fuck off anytime they want. Honestly though, most people with an ounce of common sense know that it's not all the French that are assholes, mostly just the Parisians.
...and what's wrong with retard?!?!
Booger booby WEINERPUBES!
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