Thursday, November 10, 2005

Die schlechter Affe ist hier!!!

Well, here he is!!! The evil monkey has arrived. Actually he arrived on the 30th at about 7:30 in the evening, so yeah, I'm a little behind. Everyone say hello to Michael Conrad Shehan II. That's my dad's name by the way, not mine (I hate Junior, so did my dad, that's why my name's different. Anyone calls him Junior and they lose a vital organ - or maybe two!). Ain't he cute?!?!?! He was only 6lbs 2oz, which is about 2lbs less than everyone was expecting. Unfortunately he spent the better part of his first week in the N.I.C.U. (wasn't particularly hungry, and couldn't maintain his body temperature), but he's doing just peachy now.

And here he is with mommy. I'm betting after just 11 days he's already gained a good half a pound or more. He eats like a fucking horse! Mrs. Pikey would probably cut something off if she knew I'd put this picture out here. By this point, she'd basically been living in the hospital for a week.

Anyway, I'll leave you all with this one...kinda gets the old ticker all melty-like doesn't it. If you'll excuse me...I think I'm going to go cry some more now......

God I'm SO happy (*tears of joy come gushing out of eyes*) !!!

Somebody Call Webster's, I've Got a Doozie!!!

So anyway, sorry about the hiatus, but the "monkey" on my back has taken up quite a bit of my time as of late. At any rate, I had the awful day to conquer all awful days at work the other day. There's little point in elaborating as to exactly why as it would take an intimate knowledge of what I do and the people I work with to fully comprehend it all, let's just say that, as a result of said catastrophe, I, The Pikey, invented a word to sum it all it comes...


That's right, fuckedtacular. When I first told Der Herr about it, his initial thoughts were along the lines of "Wow, um...ok! Is that negative or positive?!". Let me assure you all it's quite negative. Negative to a point where I'm considering sending it to Lewis Black and seeing if he'll use it in a rant.

I suppose one might define it as thus:

Fuckedtacular (adj.) - When a series of mindbogglingly insane events occurs, typically as a result of the actions of persons considered to be of less than average intelligence, so as to shake one's faith in humanity and generally completely ruin one's day (or perhaps week), and thus place one into a nearly uncontrollable state of homicidal rage, said events may be said to be...fuckedtacular.

In converse, Der Herr offered that if you drop the 'ed', you could perhaps make a positive connotation out of it. For instance, if you just pulled an all-night humpfest with (insert favorite supermodel/actress/singer/total hotty - and her equally hot best friend - AND you got it on tape!), and it was everything you ever dreamed it could be - to the point that you won't be able to have sex again for three months and no other experience on Earth will ever compare...ever, that could be said to be...fucktacular!

Alas, I'm currently experiencing the former (honestly - who will ever really get around to the latter?). Pity me...please?!