Wednesday, December 07, 2005

Quagmire

Quick question...

If you had to buy rubbers at 10 in the a.m., because unlike everyone else, days were your nights, and you didn't want to look like a total freak for buying rubbers at said 10 in the a.m.(I know, too late), how would you go about it?



does it need saying that my wife's doctor gave her the thumbs up for carnality yesterday?

7 comments:

Mikey the Pikey said...

Just to elaborate, I haven't had to buy (or use for that matter) a condom for about...8 years!

Herr Vogler said...

That's funny. You weren't raised around it, you've been married for 5 years, you have a kid now and you still suffer from a Catholic sense of guilt about sex.

Reed said...

what are condoms?

you should walk in with sunglasses and a jeans jacket (collar up).

if that doesn't work look at the cashier and say, "what. i'm gettin laid, what about you?"

if that doesn't work do the old 100 items thing then last minute, oh yeah these too.

if that doesn't work just, you know, buy em.

when i used to buy condoms, i always felt awkward, because i knew what they meant and so did the cashier. at least i wasn't 13. at 13 i was stealing cigarettes. at 17 i was feeling awkward about buying condoms.

i actually feel a littel awkward right now.

but...go get 'em mikey!

Reed said...

catholic sense of guilt.

brilliant.

i used to be catholic...until i hit the age of reason.

thank you George Carlin.

Mikey the Pikey said...

What's funny, and maybe a little sad, is that I only need them for a week or two until the pill starts working.

Still, it's like going to the store for your wife to get tampons. They all need them, but you still feel weird about buying them for her.

I don't know if it's so much a guilt thing, or a wondering what the clerk is thinking because this big gorilla is buying a box (and just a box, nothing else) in the wee hours of the morning thing (which still, I suppose, constitutes guilt).

In the end I suppose I shouldn't care, just be happy my sex life has returned!

Mikey the Pikey said...

Oh, and apparently nobody's a Family Guy fan around here hmm?!!

Come on, that title was great punny!

Reed said...

as long as you don't gather contraceptive's like Stewie!

(episode: Fast Times at Buddy Cianci Jr. High)